Something Undead This Way Comes
by Psychopithicus
Summary: One-shot set in RogueFanKC’s Misfitverse. Set before “Kingdom Hearts: Mutants of Twilight”. The Heartless reawaken a powerful undead warlock in an attempt to gain a useful advantage, but they find him to be much more than they bargained for.


**Hello, all. Trying out a fanfic in a different Misfitverse, specifically RogueFanKC's Misfitverse. He gave me permission to do this, so here we go.**

**DISCLAIMER: I own absolutely nothing in this fanfic. Kingdom Hearts belongs to whoever made it (I think it's Disney, not sure) and Looking for Group belongs to Ryan Sohmer and Lar DeSouza. **

New York City had likely the largest population of heroic characters the world had ever known. People like the Avengers, the Ghostbusters, the X-Men, and more dwelled in the city. The New York Museum of Natural History was also quite popular, though tonight, it had a visitor no one expected.

A humanoid creature slightly resembling a bulldog dressed in red-and-blue armor entered the museum, accompanied by a cast of strange beasts. As it was night, no one was there to notice the creature and his minions infiltrate. In addition, the security guard had fallen asleep, having collapsed from boredom with his face now planted into his telephone. Pete, aided by the mysterious creatures known as the Heartless, was here on a unique mission.

Partway into the museum was a section labeled "MIDDLE AGES". There, a black coffin rested beside a glass container holding a dark robe. The robe consisted of a dark blue lower body, a black-and-red upper body, and a black hood with a ninja-like mask. The coffin was adorned with skulls and various symbols, though none of these concerned Pete.

"Okay, boys, let's welcome our new buddy to the party," Pete chuckled, placing a beaker of potion on the coffin. "Good thing I wrote down that incanta…incantio…what was the word again? Ah, doesn't matter."

Pete took a piece of paper out of his pocket, and after clearing his throat loudly, he began to read.

"_Mighty one from days past,_" Pete began, "_your time to wake has come at last!_"

The potion on top of the coffin began to glow a bright red, and the entire coffin itself began to glow as well.

"_Merlin's spell shall be undone,_" Pete continued, "_your latest reign has now begun!_"

With that last word, the coffin absorbed the beaker, and began to shake violently as its glow became even brighter. With every passing second, the coffin rattled more and more angrily, and Pete looked on curiously.

And then the coffin exploded.

A pillar of smoke remained where the coffin once was, and a figure stood inside it. The figure emerged from the smoke, and Pete now saw it clearly. It appeared to be a skeletal figure with pale yellow eyes, wearing what appeared to be the robe inside the glass container. The figure stared ominously for a moment, then, looked behind itself.

"Was that me?" the figure said in a man's voice with a British accent, staring at the smoke behind it. "Ugh, that does it, I have _got _to stop eating those fatty babies. They're so gassy."

The robed skeleton looked around for a moment, a clawed bony finger to his chin, and his yellow eyes fell upon the robe in the glass container.

"Wait a minute, that's my robe!" the skeleton cried, pointing his hands at the container.

In an instant, fire erupted from the skeleton's hands, incinerating the container and the robe within in an instant.

"Plagiarists," the skeleton spat.

"Now _that's _what I call power!" Pete cried. "You and me, we've got business!"

"And just what makes you think I'm going anywhere with you?" the skeleton asked snidely.

"I broke you out of that coma Merlin had you in!" Pete snapped. "That's why you've got to follow the Heartless!"

"Let me make this clear to you," the skeleton said, pointing one finger at Pete. "I do what I do, why I choose, when I wish. I answer to _no one_. Why do I have to keep telling that to people? First the judge in the Plane of Suck, and now you."

"Who do you think you are, pal?!" Pete roared.

"I am _Richard!_" cried the skeleton, thrusting his hands into the air as electricity erupted from them. "Chief Warlock of the Brothers of Darkness, Lord of the Thirteen Hells, Master of the Bones, Emperor of the Black, Lord of the Undead, Lord of the Dance, Mistress of Magma…and the mayor of a little village up the cost."

Richard handed Pete a pamphlet, with the words "Pretty, Pretty Unicorn" printed onto it in what seemed to be blood.

"Quite scenic during springtime," Richard explained, "you should visit sometime."

Richard then glared darkly at Pete.

"And if you _ever_ call me 'Dick', I will make you eat your own bones," Richard threatened. "I got enough of that from the elf."

"Yeah, well, this ain't your time period, Rich!" Pete laughed. "Any of this look familiar to you?"

Richard looked around, at all the Heartless and at the walls, and shrugged.

"You've been in a coma for some long years thanks to Merlin," Pete explained, "and since you're back because of me, that means you owe me!"

"No, I don't," Richard said simply.

"You idiot!" Pete barked.

"You ugly-dog-guy!" Richard retorted mockingly.

"Shred him!" Pete roared, and the Heartless complied.

At least, they attempted to. One charged for Richard, but the undead warlock quickly threw the creature over him and allowed it to crash into a suit of armor. With his other hand, Richard released a stream of ice magic that froze several Heartless solid. More Heartless charged as Pete fled, but Richard was completely undaunted. In fact, he seemed to be actually _enjoying _himself.

"Ah, been some time since I did this," Richard said to himself as lightning erupted from his fingertips, electrocuting at least five Heartless. "Nostalgia is a wonderful thing. And murderous."

Richard then formed blades of red energy around his hands, and charged into the fray, tearing through the Heartless as they were paper and he was a pair of scissors. A Heartless made a leap for him, but Richard released a blast of fire, transforming the Heartless from a fearsome monster into a harmless pile of ashes.

"FWOOOSH!" Richard cried as he incinerated more Heartless with more burst of flame. "FWOOOSH! FWOOSH! FWOOOOOSH!"

With each Heartless that charged him, Richard simply killed it with his magic. Ones that he caught sight early were promptly disintegrated. Heartless that came close were subjected to close-range strikes by Richard's blades, slicing them to ribbons.

Richard glared at the final few Heartless. Underneath his mask, he smiled darkly. He then charged an orb of green energy beneath his clawed hands.

"Here comes the boom," Richard said with a smile in his voice.

****

Amazingly, the security guard had slept through the entire experience. He never caught wind of the explosion that occurred when Pete broke Merlin's spell over Richard, nor did he hear the crashing sounds when Richard threw a Heartless into a suit of armor, nor did he notice the many growls and snarls of the Heartless themselves. He simply slept, dreaming of a date with a Hollywood actress which would obviously never come true.

At least, he did, before a massive explosion shook him from his slumber.

"Wh-what the--?!" the guard cried. On the monitor, there was a rather colossal burn mark on the floor, where the Heartless once stood. Richard had somehow vanished. "I've got to see what's going on!"

He got up, only to find himself face-to-face with Richard himself.

"Boo," was all Richard said.

The guard fainted, collapsing onto the floor with a loud _thunk_, prompting Richard to look down at him.

"All I said was 'boo'!" Richard groaned. "I think you need to take a break from the sugar."

Richard then formed his blades again, and stabbed the guard through the chest.

"That should do it!" Richard said cheerfully before turning away, strolling down a corridor and glancing at all the artifacts as he went.

****

Due to his unfamiliarity with the current year, Richard had no idea where the exit to the museum was. As the birds outside the museum could attest, Richard had instead _created _an exit. A large hole was placed in the bottom center portion of the wall, with the undead warlock standing in it.

"Well, that was simple," Richard commented, brushing a piece of debris off his shoulder. "The only problem was that Merlin _didn't bother to bury my things with me_! Where is my pillaging shovel?! Where is my Fork of Truth?! Where are my bear arms?! Where are the teeth from that fellow who threw daggers through my chest in that tavern?! Where is my sack of organs I offered to Cale and the others as a snack for that trip to Legara?! And, most importantly of all, _where is my kidney hat which is made from real kidney_?!"

Richard sighed.

"Oh, well," shrugged the warlock. "There's much more killing to be done, I suppose."

Richard looked around at the city of New York. Towering skyscrapers dotted the landscape, cars holding late-night drivers roamed the roads, and streetlamps illuminated the night. Richard cracked his bony knuckles. A whole new time period in which to kill hundreds, maybe thousands, of lives…

This was going to be fun.

****

**And that's it. Hope everyone found it as fun to read as it was for me to write!**


End file.
